As the Saga of my On-line dating continues and is just taking shape, I've decided I need to jump right back on the horse (so to speak). But with more caution and less gusto. I'm a gusto kind of girl...jump with both feet into whatever is right in front of me. Like I really want short hair right now, so I cut my own bangs. Sometimes I look before I leap but most times I just LEAP! My cautionary dating tales could fill a book of Don't and maybe some day they will...but for now, let's stick to today.
With HSD firmly out of the picture as a dating dude I'm back on eHarmony (only cause I have 29 days left on my subscription) and found that after wading through the 87 matches that built up over the 2 months of dating HSD I only found 1 match to have any promise. Strangely this wasn't one of those moments where I *sighed* and thought about just calling HSD and throwing in the towel. My towel is still on the hook.
Today I have no delusions of grandeur for this new match...I'm not even going to name him yet. I'm just going to enjoy the first notes we've sent each other on-line and after I meet him in person I will pick a name and decide what to do. Thusfar, he's seems like a great guy. Down to the point looking for someone to 'unconditionally love' with no 'strings attached'. I won't jump into this as quickly as I did with HSD, I've learned from that and I loved it. Every year since I became a Single Mom I've learned something new about Me and what I truly want and while HSD is so many of those things, I deserve the whole package. Right? Duh.
So 2009 has taught a few things about me...that I can handle the Bio being in a relationship and actually like him better when he's in one and not focused on my life. There are things I can do on my own and should have done years ago! Like getting a place of my own. I'm the best Mama I can be even on days when I think I suck. Mama can date and let go of someone in spite of the love in my heart because it's not good for me.
Big Girl Steps.
2010...all I ask is that we work together and not against each other.
1 comments:
I just got bangs too (didn't cut them myself tho - go you! ha), and do the same thing with match.com boys - naming them - too funny! Anyway, I wish you luck in your next eHarmony foray, and I like your attitude, no expectations, take it one day at a time and see what happens. Can't wait to hear all about it!
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